Chapter 29
Ollie’s POV
I change along the way and fortunately find Ella waiting for me.
At home, I rush to the shower.
As I step into the hallway with only a towel wrapped around me, I’m surprised to see Declan standing at my bedroom door.
He freezes when he sees me.
I quickly duck past him and into my room. “Give me a minute! I say in haste, closing the door behind me. After quickly changing, I open the door again. “What is it?”
Declan swallows hard. He’s not looking at me anymore. “Ist wanted to be sure you came home on time. I didn’t see you at dinner.”
“I’m sorry,” I say. “I won’t be late again. Is there anything else?”
“Mother wishes to speak to you
about the ceremony.”
Without another word, he turns and walks away.
Strange, but… okay.
I hurry to find Diana. When I do, she surprises me.
“I didn’t call for you,” she says.
If she didn’t need me, then why did Declan lie? Was he just checking up on me? Why lie about that?
Declan’s behavior leaves me curious and confused. As Diana doesn’t need me, I suppose I should head back to my room. I’m still feeling sore from the evenings other activities and could use some rest, as well as some alone time
to reflect.
But while I’m here, I decide to talk to Diana about her expectations for the ceremony. She’s receptive as we discuss various color patterns and ideas for seating and the following reception.
When it comes time to discuss the part of the ceremony where the quadruplets would select identities for the newly adult members of the pack, Diana becomes quieter and more pensive.
She watches me while I explain what I’m thinking for the standing arrangement and order of those that will gain their identities.
“And you,” Diana says. “You will be among them.”
“Yes,” I say. I haven’t forgotten, but it’s easier to think about it if I put some cognitive distance between myself
and the situation.
Diana watches me quietly again, and I feel a bit of longing, wishing for the days when she could speak to openly. Growing up, she had been the only mother I’d ever known, and we talked about everything. Since Sylvia’s arrival, Diana has been slowly placing more and more distance between us.
Now, she feels almost like a stranger. Someone that I used to know well, who now keeps me at arm’s distance. “If you could choose yourself,” Diana asks me, after a moment more, “What identity would you choose for
choater 29.
yourself?”
Gamma,” I say at once.
+25 BONUS
With a Gamma rank, I would have more options for university. As an Omega, I wouldn’t be accepted with many packs based on that lowly rank alone. Gamma was beneath Alpha, but would still offer me a lot of options, as well as several decent prospects for employment with any pack,
The choice seems to surprise Diana, whose eyes widen slightly. “You wouldn’t want to be an Alpha?”
At one point in my life, back when I thought I belonged to this family, I might have hoped to be gifted an Alpha identity. Everything has changed in the past few years, and ruly, my expectations could not be lower.
To even hope to be labeled a Gamma might be too much. To dream of being an Alpha is an impossible fantasy now. Even if I asked for it, Diana would likely refuse me outright.
“I know better than to ask for that,” I say. “My place in the pack,” and in this family, “is not among the elite. I just want to contribute in my own way.”
Diana nods. “You’ve grown.”
Her easy acceptance of the words hurts more than it should. In the past, she and the brothers would have been my most staunch supporters. They would have been furious at me for purposefully selling myself short.
Now… I’ve grown. All because I’ve accepted that my place will never be beside them.
After so long I should be used to the disappointment of rejection, yet, for as hard as I try to steel myself against the hurt, every time still hurts like the first.
Sara Lili is a daring romance writer who turns icy landscapes into scenes of fiery passion. She loves crafting hot love stories while embracing the chill of Iceland’s breathtaking cold.
